Saturday, June 5, 2010


This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 11; the eleventh edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

You know, I've always hated you. HATED YOU.
You were always so domineering, so one sided.
It was your fault I grew up to be who I am now.
You were never willing to admit you were wrong.
I wanted to have fun, but you didn't let me.
My slightest tantrum made you to hit out at me.
My smallest failure made you lose belief in me.
I wanted to dream, you made them into nightmares.
I wanted to chase desire, you made me chase success.
I faltered at a hurdle, you tried to push me away.
I've realized that I've always hated you. HATED YOU.

Now you are gone; this world has not your imprints.

I've realized that I've always loved you. LOVED YOU.
I thought you pushed me away from goals, but it was failure.
I thought you made me chase success, I forgot you didn't tell how.
I thought you gave me nightmares, I forgot I'd lost my dreams.
I thought you lost belief in me, but I know know it was your worry.
I thought you hit out in anger, but I know now it was to teach me.
I thought you didn't let me have fun, but I know now I didn't know what fun was.
You weren’t willing to admit you were wrong, but I wasn’t always right.
You maybe the reason why I’m morose, but you also made me a survivor.
You may have been domineering, but you taught me to stand up for myself.
I’ve realized that I’ve always loved you. LOVED YOU.

Now you are gone; this world has not your imprints.
These realizations, it shall remain always hidden.
I’ve hid them from you, hid them from myself, never wanting to believe in them.
You were my guiding light; no. You are my guiding light still.
Who I am, it is all because of you. I wish I could let my tears be hidden.

Today, I stand at your grave, realizing how much you meant to me.
Dad, would it have made a difference if I’d have told you all this before?
Thoughts…hidden. Feelings…hidden. Love…hidden. Happiness…hidden.
I’ve only regret for all this now…that’s one thing that I can never hide.

The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.


  1. Truly Touching. Great for a monologue.

    All the best for the contest :)

    My Blog

  2. Touching, nostalgic, and quite moving narration,....
    one of the best posts i have in BAT till now....
    wil consider this for voting

  3. poignant indeed JSW, and i can relate! well done!

    Leo - Hidden

  4. Haunting. All of us have been guilty of such misinterpretations

  5. True feelings and true thoughts are mostly hidden in the hearts.
    Beautifully written

  6. Cannot stress this enough-brilliant thoughts.
    I have tried to convey a similar strain of thought in my post and just loved the eloquence of your words-esp the line "this world has not your imprints".

  7. Brought a sad smile to my face! I wonder why are such posts being ignored by the regular BAT members? Awesomely put, chief!

    All the best for BAT!


    PPS: Reading it again, and again! :)

  8. This was the nicest poem i came across ya..great thoughts..:)

  9. Something we all can relate to .but have been put best in words :) Beautiful JSW :) All the best for BATOM :)